Katy Perry is opening up about hard times she faced as suicidal thoughts passed over her mind during a therapy session.

The singer has been posting live streaming videos of herself leading her hectic schedule– from opening her latest album Witness for the first time to doing yoga with Jesse Tyler, leading 96-hour hour YouTube programme called Katy Perry – Witness World Wide, which will come to an end on Monday.

Perry so badly wants to be Katheryn Hudson

The Roar superstar had a therapy session on Thursday with licensed therapist Siri Sat Nam Singh from cable network Viceland’s series The Therapist, where she opened up about hard times in her life that made her burst in tears as she recalled such painful memories.

Perry said that suicidal thoughts used to pass over her mind in her past and that she wrote her 2013 song, By the Grace of God, about that hard times and depressing period she used to face and deal with.

“I feel ashamed that I would have those thoughts, feel that low and that depressed,” she said. “You can be right, or you can be loved. I just want to be loved.”

Comments From Katy

Perry also opened up about struggling to be herself amid all the hype surrounding her pop star life.

“I so badly want to be Katheryn Hudson [her birth name] that I don’t even want to look like Katy Perry anymore sometimes — and that is a little bit of why I cut my hair,” she said.

“I’m a bit more nerdy than everybody thinks I am,” Perry continued. “I’m a big goofball. The fantasy of Katheryn went into Katy, and made this bigger-than-life personality.”

On Saturday, while recording the videos, Perry hinted at long-time feud with Blank Space star Taylor Swift.

During an interview with Arianna Huffington, the singer said she’s “ready to let it go.”

“I forgive her, and I’m sorry for anything I ever did, and I hope the same from her … I love her, and I want the best for her. And I think she’s a fantastic songwriter,” Perry concluded.